Reason: You’re Distracted During Sex
It’s not just those endless to-do lists that make your mind wander. You’re wired that way. According to brain scan research, women’s brains are naturally more active than men’s, even during sex. The reason: lower levels of the neurotransmitter dopamine. “Dopamine creates the desire to go after a reward—in this case, an orgasm,” explains Clayton. Dopamine also increases the flow of sensory impulses to the genitals, essential for arousal. But low levels of dopamine caused by chronic stress or medical conditions can distract you during sex.
How science can help
A supplement that contains the hormone DHEA
This hormone (dehydroepiandrosterone) may increase dopamine production and normally spikes right before orgasm to enhance desire and focus. Taking 300 mg of DHEA an hour before sex significantly increased both mental and physical arousal in postmenopausal women, according to a study published in the Journal of Women’s Health & Gender-Based Medicine. Clayton only recommends 25 to 50 mg and warns that DHEA can affect some people’s cholesterol levels, however. So be sure to check with your doctor before taking it.
A simple test for ADD
Up to 2 million adult women in the United States suffer from attention deficit disorder, which may be associated with low dopamine levels, says Daniel G. Amen, MD, a psychiatrist, brain imaging specialist, and author of Sex on the Brain. This can literally make it difficult to pay attention during lovemaking. However, “when a woman is finally treated for ADD, usually with a combination of drug therapy and behavior modification, it improves her sex life—not to mention the rest of her life as well,” he says. To get a test for ADD, go to prevention.com/links.
Reason: You Have Trouble Reaching Orgasm
Women typically blame this on psychological problems, but the reasons are often physical. Poor blood flow to the genitals, for example, caused by cardiovascular conditions like diabetes or heart disease, makes it harder to have an orgasm. Another common culprit: declining hormone levels due to perimenopause and menopause. Smoking can also disrupt blood flow by constricting blood vessels.
How science can help
The amino acid L-arginine
Like Viagra, this naturally occurring amino acid increases the production of nitric oxide, a chemical released by the genital nerves during arousal, sending much-needed blood to the area. Amen suggests taking 1,000 to 3,000 mg of L-arginine supplement (available at drugstores) right before sex.
A new antidepressant
The inability to experience orgasm is a common side effect of antidepressants called selective serotonin reuptake inhibitors (SSRIs). That’s because the serotonin boost you get from these drugs decreases dopamine, which leads to sexual problems. Clayton often switches her patients to bupropion HCI, an antidepressant that doesn’t affect serotonin levels, enhances dopamine function, and, in several studies of women, has boosted desire.
Reason: It’s Dry Down Below
The lining of the vagina is extremely estrogen sensitive, and when hormone levels fluctuate during perimenopause, women produce less lubrication prior to and during intercourse. Hormone therapy is a solution for some women. But there are other alternatives.
How science can help
A lubricant that goes straight to the source: Whipple recommends Zestra (available at drugstores), a nonprescription feminine arousal fluid made from botanical oils, which stimulates nerves and blood vessels to increase arousal. Women who used Zestra five times in a 2- to 3-week period (many described a warm feeling in the genital area) boosted their sexual pleasure significantly, even if they were taking libido-dampening antidepressants or had sexual arousal disorder, according to a study on women ages 31 to 57 published in the Journal of Sex & Marital Therapy.
Locally applied estrogen: This can significantly improve the lubrication situation—without the dangers (such as increased breast cancer) of oral hormone therapy. Whipple prefers insertable vaginal estrogen rings or tablets over vaginal estrogen creams.
Reason: You Feel Disconnected From Your Partner
The demands of family and work life can often make long-married couples feel like strangers in the bedroom.
How science can help
An ovulation kit: Oxytocin, often referred to as the bonding hormone, spikes right before ovulation, a time when most women are in the mood. According to Amen, oxytocin also helps dull your memory of your partner’s annoying traits (like his dirty socks on the floor) enough to let you feel attracted to him. Chart your cycle and schedule “date night” right before you ovulate.
Sleep Your Way Sexy: Snoring can hurt your sex life Obstructive sleep apnea (OSA) could be an unrecognized cause of sexual dysfunction. In one 2006 study, researchers found that women’s problems reaching orgasm increased with the severity of their OSA. Treating men and women for OSA (using continuous positive airway pressure, or CPAP) improved sex drive in all of them, according to another study. For tips on diagnosing and treating OSA, go to the National Sleep Foundation at sleepfoundation.org.
Coming to a Bedroom Near You: 2 Libido-Enhancing Drugs
Ask your doc to keep an eye out for these higher-desire meds that are in the works:
LibiGel: The only prescription testosterone gel to boost sexual desire in women, this hormone treatment should receive FDA approval by 2011.
Bremelanotide Nose Spray: First in a new class of drugs called melanocortin agonists, this nasal spray – just click once and breathe through a small inhaler, 15 to 30 minutes before sex – increases blood flow to the genitals. Unlike Viagra, it has no effect on the cardiovascular system (it works via the central nervous system). In clinical trials of both premenopausal and postmenopausal women with sexual dysfunction, it significantly increased desire and genital arousal. Expect FDA approval for women in 2011.